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This is not how I imagined Spider Jerusalem would sound.

The text comes from Transmetropolitan volume zero, Tales of Human Waste. Of course, the animator (John Franglen) changed the corporation names to ones which exist today. If I walked outside and saw a franchise gun store, a fast-food joint selling cloned human meat and a giant television screen alternating between images of a Chinese woman eating candy and a news anchor announcing that radical French terrorists released a parasitic hentai fetish meme into the San Francisco fish market, well, I’d be afraid I’d eaten the moldy rye bread again.

Oh yes, if any of my three readers are browsing from work, Spider does use a couple words referring to the biological process which brought us all into being in order to express strong emotion.

7 Comments

    • Not A Reader
    • Posted Friday, 25 May 2007 at 17:38 pm
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    You’re right, the voice should sound like someone who lives with a cigarette almost always hanging out of his mouth. I imagine something more gravelly emitted from the bowels of dark humor.

    Oddly, that video dude sounds like a friend of mine: an American with a slightly stuffy accent from hanging around the Elizabethan Club too much and because he keeps his teeth too close together when he talks. Perhaps this guy was attempting the “gritted teeth-ness” of SJ. (Don’t get me wrong, I love British accents…on British people.)

    • John Franglen
    • Posted Friday, 25 May 2007 at 17:47 pm
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    I’ll agree that it’s a strange voice for Spider, but taking the quote on it’s own (in the context I was using it for, as an advert for a TV show about monoculture, I thought it worked quite well

    • Still Not A Reader
    • Posted Friday, 25 May 2007 at 20:50 pm
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    Oh, I see, it was an assignment for a course. If that was a real TV ad for a show on monoculture (which I rant about often enough) here in the US, I would be thoroughly amused. It could only be shown on Comedy Central, though, because of the KCUF word. Original use of comic dialogue – hope you got points for that.

    Just chain-smoke three packs of cigarettes before you do it next time. ;-)

  1. Obviously, the real Spider Jerusalem would sound exactly like Johnny Depp circa 1998.

  2. Heh. For the record, that’s an authentic English accent from my housemate there, cause I’m writing this from Devon, UK.

    It’s true the that swearing would make it unsuitable for most advertising (my tutors comments was that I should’ve seen what it was like with bleeping), but I decided to cover that by making sure there was no swearing in the 20 and 30 second versions I had to do.

  3. In context — or rather, in the context of a clip and without the context of the comics — the voice does work. It’s pretty spiffy!

    • Still Not A Reader
    • Posted Saturday, 26 May 2007 at 14:59 pm
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    John, yeah, I meant for your housemate to smoke the cigarettes, and knew his accent was real. Funnily enough, late last night I went to my mailbox and what was in it but a postcard from London! From my very friend who sounds like your mate. I had to laugh at the timing, however it’s postmarked 14-V from the Jubilee Mail Centre – that long for a postcard? (He’s probably already back in the US by now.) Well, he apparently drank many pints and lamented “Why oh why can’t we get good bitter in the states?” I tell you, he’s a complete Anglophile. I think I’ll just send him the link with no explanation. Thanks.